


Different (Good or Bad?)

by wowthwtslame



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: (proposal leak), Angst with a Happy Ending, Dialogue Heavy, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, Happy Ending, look they’re just baby ok, slight suicidal ideation on stevens end whoopsie, soft, spoilers for suf leak #3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-03-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:47:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23113429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wowthwtslame/pseuds/wowthwtslame
Summary: Connie and Steven have a situation to work out.
Relationships: Connie Maheswaran & Steven Universe, Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe
Comments: 3
Kudos: 72





	Different (Good or Bad?)

“Steven, I can’t believe you! I... God, Steven. Do you not understand how proposals work?” Connie’s voice echoed through the clearing, irritation building up. “I- We’re _kids_! Does age have, like, any meaning to you? Also, I’m my own person! I’m going to school! I’m going to college! I want to be Connie!” Her shouting continued. She sighed and pulled at her hair. “Steven, I... I have _literally_ no words to describe how I feel right now.” Her back was still towards him. “Look, I understand why Ruby and Sapphire did it, but they’ve been in love for  years ! _Years_ , Steven! They both wanted to be Garnet! You’re the only one out of the two of us who wants to be Stevonnie forever!” Her hand gestures became more exaggerated. “Did you just think I’d say yes? Did you think I’d just do that for you? Steven, I don’t understand how you could be so  _selfish_! ” 

Her fists curled until her knuckles turned white. “You’ve embarrassed both of us!” Her eyebrows pinched as she turned to look at him. “...Y-you’re...” he swallowed roughly. “...you’re right. I’m sorry.” Connie examined his face. No tears, no ugly snot running from his nose, nothing. Just dejectedness. “I... yeah. You’re right. I... I shouldn’t have done that.” His lip quivered. “I’m...  _gah_! ” His face burned a bright, glowing pink as he gripped his hair. “I’m so stupid! _God_! I was right!” He started laughing. “No one needs me! I’m horrible! I’m toxic! I can’t even be normal in my dreams!” 

Tears began streaming as he laughed harder. “You’re right! You’re always right, Connie!” He looked her dead in the eyes. “They should have sped up the execution on Homeworld! God knows how much  _ good _ that would do for this _Steven-infected planet_!” He was laughing hysterically. “That cactus was right to be mad! I’m horrid! The  second I find someone I trust I cling to them like... like a damned cactus needle! I’m more of a prick than a literal cactus!” 

Steven’s laughter became more and more like crying.

“God... I...” He chuckled dejectedly. “I really thought I had changed for the better... I’m so pathetic that I resort to the extremes just to have  someone  who won’t invalidate my stupid feelings or leave me behind!” Steven fell to his knees as the pink covering his body had faded. “You were right to want to leave me. I’m just as bad as m-my mom...” He curled in on himself. “She told me that when I loved being myself, that was her loving me. How can she say that when I  _don’t_ love myself?! I  _ hate _ being me!” He gripped his hair again. 

He sat there for what seemed an eternity before soft hands took his own and gently removed them from his hair. “Steven...” He pulled away. “Steven, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t... I shouldn’t have said those things... I shouldn’t have called you selfish or-“ “But you were right. I am. I just,” he sniffled grossly, “need you. And it was wrong of me to do that and... I’m sorry.” Tears pooled in his eyes. “I... everything is just... it’s so much... I can’t look at Pearl because I’ll only be able to think of that time she watched me literally almost fall to my death because she was... she was upset that I wasn’t my mom. I can barely stand to be around Amethyst because I know she probably hates me for that stuff I said about her. A-and Garnet... all I’ve done is ruin things... I split her up when I revealed the truth about my mom...”

Connie brushed a tear thoughtfully from his face.

“I’m so, so desperate, Connie. I... I can’t be a friend because the only thing I know how to do is help people and no one needs it anymore. No one needs  me anymore. I’ve just been... hurting people. Causing more problems.” He shivered. He felt thin arms wrap around his frame. “You haven’t been hurting  me. I know you want to refute that statement because I know you, but you haven’t hurt me. Sure, this thing made me upset for a hot minute but... I’m not hurt.”

She felt Steven trembling under her embrace.

“If anything, I’m more hurt that you think all of those things about yourself.” She leaned away and put a gentle hand under her companion’s chin, raising it so he’d look at her. His splotchy face roughly contrasted the dirt smeared by the salty tears on his face. His eyes still didn’t find her though. “Steven, please, look at me.” Hesitatingly, he finally did. “Do you... do you really think that they should have... sped up the execution process? That Earth would have been better without you?” Her eyes became ocular faucets of their own when Steven met her with silence. She pulled him firmly towards herself and embraced him tightly, his head shoved into her right clavicle. She sat for what seemed an eternity before she felt strong but trembling arms return the hug. 

They held each other for a while. Neither of them minded. At one point, Connie spoke. “You know, if we were both adults, I’d have accepted your proposal. We wouldn’t have to be Stevonnie all the time because I like seeing your face. But I’m just saying, if you and I had been adults, I’d’ve said ‘yes.’” She chuckled when she felt Steven freeze. He pulled away. “R-really?” His voice cracked with nervousness. This made Connie chuckle more. “Of course, silly!” They were both giggling now. 

The giggling died down. Connie blushed. “Can I... try something... different?” Steven’s already splotchy pink face became beet-red. “Different... good... or different bad?” He asked nervously. “Depends,” Connie tersely but playfully replied. She shied away a bit again, gripping her arm in nervousness. Steven put a kind hand on her shoulder. “Hey, are you-“ He was cut off by Connie putting her hand to his cheek and...

.

..

...

..

.

Steven had seen this before. He had seen Ruby and Sapphire do it. He knew Peridot wanted Stefan and Jessica to do it. He thought he’d know what his first one would be like, considering he was, in fact, a master of weddings and romance. 

However, Steven’s first kiss was not at all what he expected it to be. He thought it would be long, passionate, and, frankly, in a more romantic or even uplifting setting. Not like this.

As Connie pulled away he could still feel the tingle of her soft lips on his. “...Good...” he mumbled. Connie looked at him, puzzled, then snorted. “What?” She giggled. “That was... different good.” 

Steven’s second kiss lasted longer than the first.


End file.
